Merry Christmas!

Since I am not at work, I am unable to check my facebook or myspace, which drives me nuts. The only internet access I have is at the public library which blocks all those fun sites. SO- if anyone wants to know what I am up to- gotta check out this blog.

The most wonderful outstanding news I have to share is that I had an ultrasound yesterday- and my Cervical Length is more than 4! For those of you who have never had any pregnancy complications- this is freaking outstanding for someone with an incompetent cervix! I am so geeked about that I can hardly believe it- mind you cervical length can change daily but at least right now I am doing great!

Gary has been sick since thursday! Not just under the weather but flat out sick as hell. He has some sort of virus that has taken over his mouth (that hand, foot, mouth thing I believe!) and he has been unable to eat since Thursday last week. He has lost over 20 lbs in less than a week. He has been to the doctor three times and has been unable to work. He can barely get out of bed. He was at the doctor again today and if he is any worse he needs to been seen again on Friday. They have mentioned putting him in the hospital because of dehydration. Hopefully he will start feeling better soon. This is supposed to be a 7-10 day thing and we are on day 7 today.

The snow is driving me nuts. Gary has to drag himself out to plow every couple of days and I am in no shape to shovel or brave the weather getting stuck.. While my cervix looks great now I still have to be resting as much as possible since last week Thursday at my regular OB visit my blood pressure was quite high.

I think we are ready for Christmas- and if not- it's too late now. Just have to wrap the things we have for Gunner and I'm done. By the way the snow is falling today I am doubting we will make the candlelight christmas eve service at church since Gary will be in bed and venturing out with my 4 year old at 11:00 pm tonight probably isn't a great idea.

So all that is left to say is Merry Christmas- hope you all have a wonderful holiday- be safe in the snow!

Not much to tell

Doctor appt was routine- except for the blood pressure. Mine was like 138 over 91 and that earned me the privledge of laying on my left side for 10 minutes till the doc came in and checked it again. By then it was 134 over 68, and all I could think was "one way or another I will be on bedrest". This doc is setting up my ultrasound for next week- they are doing the growth thing and checking cervical length. She wants me to lay low and rest till I have to go back to work Jan 5th- then after 2 days of working she wants to see me again to see how I am handling work and being up and around. Doesnt sound very promissing as far as continuing to work- but whatever it takes to get this kid here safe and sound.

Doc appt today!

I have to go to Grand Rapids today to pick up Gunner's Christmas pictures and since I am making the trip anyways- I changed my doctor appt from Monday until today! Hopefully I can talk them into an ultrasound to check cervical length and maybe pics of the peanut. Tommorow we are supposed to get a crap load of snow and more snow on Sunday night into Monday. So I am hoping to finish up all my shopping and galavanting today in Grand Rapids and not have to make that trip again! I'll let you know what the doctor says later!

17 weeks (yes I am still counting!)

Hope you all had a safe drive into work this morning. Myself, I was quite annoyed that I had to go in at all. I have to try and remember that this is the last week for me until after the holidays. Gunner is pretty excited about Mommy and he having so much "bacation" time.

Last week was just average except for all the snow we got in the middle of it. Gary spent a lot of time plowing, and go figure "agent orange" sounds like she is ready to blow. Wednesday we got pictures taken of my sibblings and our children which is a surprise for my parents for Christmas. Gunner about knocked his bottom teeth out at Menards (trying to go through the turn stile on the way out!) (Man was that funny!) and he also cut his own hair the day before the pictures. Luckily he just got a couple spots on the side and it was easily disguised. Gary worked his tail off, I don't think he got home before 11 pm any day last week. Friday night Gunner and I stopped in at Nana's for pizza which included all of my sibblings again and our kids. Mom was pretty stoked that all her kids were all together.

Saturday Gary spent the day hauling the Christmas decorations out of the basement. He wasn't really impressed with the amount of it all. The tree ticked him off and Gunner drove us both nuts. But it is up and the train set is even under it. Saturday night we dropped Gunner of at Nana's and my sister, her husband and Gary and I went out to see 4 Christmases- which was hilarious. Afterwards we went to Ruby Tuesdays. They have been together since Rachel was a junior in high school and this is the very first time we went out together. We had a great time. I felt bad for Tim who is still on crutches- that weather was horrid. BTW- Tim is doing ok, still not real sure on the outcome of his foot but it is pretty minor considering he fell over 7 stories. The scar on his forearm from where they took the skin graft is pretty nasty but again in the scope of things- it's no biggie.

Sunday we were up early and off to church for the preschool Christmas program. Gunner did well. Somehow between when we left him in his classroom and the time they walked into the sanctuary he completely untucked his shirt which mortified me, but he was still adorable. He is just Gunner- that says it all. My parents, Gary's parents, and my brother all made an appearance. My sister was there since her son goes to preschool also. So again my mom was all emotional since all of her kids were in church (and no one died or got married!) After church it was grocery shopping and laundry. We headed over to Gary's parents for dinner and ended the night watching Survivor.

Gunner didn't have school today because of the weather and Gary didn't go in until 1:00pm which ruined the whole day for him. We did a potluck at work and tommorow is the pizza party on the service floor where I work. I have felt ok. Tired all the time and if I am up and around all day by say 5pm I am exhausted and my sides ache like no tommorow. I have the occasional cramp here and there but nothing frequent or intense. It feels like a bowling ball is sitting on my pelvis at times. A heaviness is all I can say to explain it. When I feel that way I try to stay laying down for as long as possible. I'm still very anxious to get back to the doctor and be more insistent on an ultrasound to see what my cervix is doing. The next few weeks of laying around will be helpful, but going back to school in January is a little frightening. Hopefully it is just me being paranoid and pesimistic. I would love to carry this kid till May. My 20 week ultrasound will be before I go back to school so hopefully that will take care of any left over worries.

I also hate snow, ice and winter in general. Just in case you were wondering!

Mondays are so ..blah!

I did survive the end of last week. Going back to work was hard. I don't want to be on bedrest by any means, but it was nice being able to lay around and relax for a bit. It makes me way less nervous and stressed about what is going on with my cervix. Wednesday was rough being the first day and getting used to sitting up instead of laying down. Thursday I was in pain, going shopping on my lunch hour was a very bad idea. Friday I laid as low as possible at work trying to avoid feeling like I did on Thursday. Gunner and I were both in bed by 9:30 on Friday night since Gary told me he would be extremely late. (Which he was all week)

Saturday morning I headed out with Gunner( and Jennie along to help). We went to GR to get Gunner's christmas pictures taken. Even if I was feeling fabulous and was not pregnant I would still need Jennie's help on picture day. The roads were crap (Gary was right) and we had to go pretty slow. Pictures went well, afterwards we went to Olive Garden for lunch and headed home in the snow. It took about an hour and 40 minutes to get back. I hung out for the rest of the afternoon with Gunner while Gary worked on the Agent Orange (the plow truck) We opted not to go to Gary's work Christmas Party since it was in Grand Rapids and the roads probably were worse not better. Instead we did grocery shopping and took Gunner to Pizza Hut. Gunner was fine with that, he doesn't like Gary and I to do anything without him anyways.

Sunday was a day of rest for me. I laid around all day getting up only to get a snack or do a little laundry. And I have a laundry helper- Gunner picks the stuff up off the floor that I point at and throws them in the washing machine. Repetative bending is on my don't do list. Gary went to my parents to plow their driveway and Gunner decided to spend the day with Nana and Papa. Gary picked him up around 5:00 pm. I had to get ready for the women's christmas dinner at my mom's church so the boys were on their own for the evening. The dinner always is nice, except for the company at the table. The pastors daughter who is 12/13 (somewhere in there) sat across from me and was a complete heathen. Food on the floor, talking during the program, making rude noises, playing with the candles. You name it, my four year old could have done it better. So what should have been a nice evening was ruined by the little monster at my table, and the fact that her mother let her get away with it. What I also find totally ignorant is when someone there who knows all about Gunner his prematurity, and my cervix issues asks me dumb questions. "How far are you hoping to make it this time?" What kind of F-ing question is that? Seriously- Umm how many ways can I answer that and tell her to piss off at the same time? So I looked her straight in the face and said "well if I don't make it till the end of January the baby doesn't have a snowball's chance in hell" Yes I said hell at church. She almost choked on her coffee. I then followed up with we would take however many weeks we can get especially since everything after 27 weeks (which is the end of February) will be a new experience for us. It is like having people you know and know your story complain about being tired of being pregnant in front of me. That kind of thing actually cost me a friendship back when Gunner was born. I just can't forgive that person for being so selfish and inconsiderate in her comments to me. It was a stressful evening, good thing I had rested up all day.

Today getting out of bed was awful. I set the alarm for 6:30 pm instead of am but luckily woke in time. I hated leaving the house and am dead tired. Gunner and I are counting down the days till Christmas Break! Mommy gets 2 full weeks and have the option of taking a 3rd if I want to use my vacation. So we will see how things go and what the doctors say between now and then. I completed my day by fighting with the bitches at the dentist office. We have had a large insurance credit on our account for over 2 months which is supposed to be refuned to us and they keep fighting us about it. This is just one more reason I hate the place- I could go on forever with examples of reasons why they suck and are totally unprofessional but that would be overkill so I will just say this was the last straw. So I was finally pissed enough to cancel any appointments I had and tell them I wanted a copy of my file. And was told no. Can't have it, if I want a copy of x-rays have to pay for them. Mind you both of my dental insurance companies have already paid for those freakin x-rays twice. That was it, I told her to piss off. (not in those exact words!) And go figure the "insurance" lady in the office who is supposed to call me back, hasn't. Imagine that. Gary is super busy at work, which makes for nice paychecks, but he is dog tired when he drags home at 11:30 at night. And it is hard on Gunner not getting to see him at night. Usually means Gunner goes to sleep in my bed so his dad can wake him up and at least cuddle him before he puts him in his own bed. Looks like today is going to be another miserable one for him.

I don't go back to the doctor till Dec 22nd, and then hopefully we can schedule my 20 week ultrasound. I want that done before the kids come back to Ferris so if there are any changes in my cervix that are bad, I can make the decision about going back to work or not, and give work time to find more help. It drives me nuts all the waiting. I want to see more pictures of this baby. I want to see a nice long, closed cervix too!

The picture is of Gunner and his "pilot jacket" which showed up in a package from Grandma and Grandpa Bruce on Saturday. Gunner is in LOVE! He won't take the darn jacket off. He is also informed us that he is going to fly big jets really fast when he gets older. Thanks Grandma and Grandpa- Gunner loved his surprise!

Getting you up to speed-

So- I'm finally back at work. Yeah ( I think!) Last week was brutal. Tuesday we got to the hospital around 9:00 am when we were supposed to. I got checked in, gowned, IV'd and the waiting began. Seems my doc was running behind from his prior surgery so instead of 10:30 surgery time we didn't get rolling until 11:45. The only bad part was the spinal. The doc doing that did my epidural when I had Gunner and was fabulous so we requested him again. This time he had a hard time getting it exactly right. So while I am on the operating table leaning forward curled into a ball with my OB doc hanging on to me the old "I'm going to be sick" sensation hit me hard. I had to sit up a bit and my doc grabbed the trash cart since the nurse couldn't locate a basin right away. Once I sat up and got a little air the feeling subsided and then he could finish the spinal. Once it was in place I had two lead anchors for legs and got situated on the table and the "fun" began. It is weird being awake through something like that. There you are laying on the operating table with your naked bottom half hanging out there for the world to see. While my OB doc was scrubbing up the nurse covered everything, but still those few minutes are the most embarrassing ones you can imagine. Then while they are stitching my cervix up you can feel them pulling the sutures tight, it like almost shakes your whole bottom end, if I hadn't felt so awkward I would have laughed every time he pulled a suture snug. He got two stitches in, which made me pretty happy and I was off to the recovery room.
Recovery rooms suck. The nurses there drive me crazy, while this time they were more caring, I really don't want to hear them complaining about how busy they are or when they are going to get to take their lunches. I am here, I am awake, if you want to have that conversation don't do it over top of me. The biggest concern was where to send me. They can't get rid of patients fast enough. I was a tough one. Couldn't go to Outpatient because I had a spinal, couldn't go to short term since I had a cerclage, the 9th floor (L &D) was full, so I had to hang out until a bed opened up there. Once I got upstairs they got me some juice and checked the bleeding and told me once I could pee I could go home. So I got up and attempted to walk to the bathroom. That is the wackiest feeling, your feet are there but then again they aren't. Once I did my business I was dressed and out the door. Which was still around 3:30 or 4:00 p.m.
By the time Gary got me home I was in excruciating pain, which I found out was from an extremely full bladder which I couldn't quite feel yet. Once I got rid of the pee I was just uncomfortable. I climbed into my bed and stayed there the rest of the night. This would have been about the end of the tale if I hadn't had to get up about 3 am to barf my guts out. Kind of made me wonder what was coming up since I hadn't eaten anything all day. And as luck would have it the puking session was followed by hours on the pot with diarrhea. I would have worried about it if the same fate hadn't hit my hubby and Gunner the next day also. Thank you to whomever I caught that bug from. The cerclage wouldn't have been nearly as fun without the extra sickness.
The rest of the past week was pretty tame. We went to my moms house for Thanksgiving, Gary took care of Gunner and I and we did pretty much nothing. Yesterday I drove myself to my doctor appointment and got cleared to come back to work. My OB is not one for taking tons of ultrasounds or measurements. He feels that a cervical length on me is pretty irrelevant. My cervix was almost nonexistant to begin with. What I have now may be what I have till the end or it may change. But who is to say what will be enough for me. If I start having any complications then we will be more aggressive, but if I am feeling fine he would rather leave things alone for now. I guess compared to all the people I have heard that go every two weeks for TVA's it is really lenient, but I do have a healthy, happy 4 year old son because of this man- so I guess I will just go with it and trust his opinion. I am bummed that I won't get to see my peanut more frequently- but hey in 5 weeks I will get my big scan so hey what the heck.